Thu Oct 16 13:40:09 1997
- Message No. 1559
From: "ynotfix"
Subject: english vs. EC/EU
For fun:
>The European Commission have just announced
an agreement whereby English will be the official
language of the EU rather than German, which
was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations,
Her Majesty's Government conceded that English
spelling had some room for improvement and has
accepted a 5 year phase-in plan that would be known
as "EuroEnglish": In the first year, "s" will replace
the soft "c"..
Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump
with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favor of
the "k". This should klear up konfusion and
keyboards kan have 1 less letter. There will be
growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year,
when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with
the "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20%
shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of
the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the
stage where more komplikated changes are
possible. Governments will enkorage the removal
of double letters, which have always ben a
deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that
the horible mes of the silent "e"'s in the language
is disgraceful, and they should go away.
By the 4th yar, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps
such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be
dropd from vords kontaiining "ou" and similar
changes vul kors be aplid to ozer kombinations
of leters. After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli
sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or
difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand
ech ozer.
> ZE DREM VIL FINALI KUM TRU!!
>
>
Thought you Euro guys would like this one!
...................
Tony Angco
Triumph Trophy 1200, & Trident 900
BMW K100RS, Honda XLV750R
There's a fine line between fishing and
just standing on the shore like an idiot.....
o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-
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