26 Jun 1998 15:03:43 +0000 - Message No. 3453
From: "Florian Moesch"

Subject: No subject


Do you believe?
 
 At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly
 compared the computer industry with the auto industry and
 stated: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer
 industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars
 that got 1000 miles to the gallon."
 
 In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press
 release stating(by Mr Welch himself):
 
 If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all
 be driving cars with the following characteristics:
 
 1.  For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
 2.  Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would
     have to buy a new car.
 3.  Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no
     reason, and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
 4.  Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn,
     would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in
     which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
 5.  Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you
     bought "Car95" or "CarNT."  But then you would have to
     buy more seats.
 6.  Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun,
     reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but
     would only run on five per cent of the roads.
 7.  The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights
     would be replaced by a single "general car default" warning
     light.
 8.  New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
 9.  The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before going
     off.
 10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock
  you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously  lifted
  the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the
     radio antenna.
 11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe
     set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even
     though they neither need them nor want them.  Attempting to
     delete this option would immediately cause the car's
     performance to diminish by 50% or more.  Moreover, GM would
     become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.
 12. Everytime GM introduced a new model car buyers would
     have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the
     controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
 13. You'd press the "start" button to shut off the engine.

Rgds

Flo



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